Valentine's funk

Every year this day comes and goes. Each year, at the end of it, I am left with the same feeling. A feeling of...well...it's hard to describe.

You see, we aren't ones to celebrate valentines day. Being love is something we choose to show all year, we haven't ever been big on making one day more about love than any other. Neither of us big romantics, usually choose to sit together and enjoy each other's company , watching a show we both enjoy and having dinner.

Why then, by the end of the day do I tend to have this unsettled, unsatisfied feeling?

I think it's due to the amount of exposure around me to what anyone and everyone of my friends has done, gotten or gone. I really should start avoiding social media during holidays like this. Especially since I usually walk away with this heavy feeling.

It all boils down to comparison. Every year I expect it to look different. To feel different to be different. But every year, it's just the same.

I am content with where life is taking us right now. I am elated to have not one, but two loves that I am blessed to share love with day in and day out. I am spoiled by their love. Their love on top of the already overwhelming love of my Creator is a greater gift than I could ever imagine.

But still...
The shadows lurk...

The best way I know to combat this feeling is to take a step back. To remember, this day, is just like any other day. I got more kisses than I can count from my sweet toddler. I have a husband who works hard, and takes a step forward in his job for me. For our family. We have a church family who cares, so much about how we're really doing. We have family surrounding us that will bend over backwards to help us. We have friends, who may as well be family, who are always there to listen when we need an ear.

I can proudly say that I am a spoiled girl. I need to remember, that today may be valentine's day, but that doesn't mean it's the only day to show love. I also need to remember I am not built to feel love the way others are and he's not built to show love like other guys.

I didn't marry Mr. Romance. That is OKAY by me. I doubt I'd know what to do if he was. I married the man who shows love in the everyday, little deeds. That's what matters most.

All that's left to say is this: I hope when midnight comes around and it is February 15, none of us stop showing love to those who matter most to us. You never know who may just need it.